I've been overwhelmed with continued learning about God's great character. A few days ago, I went for a run. I don't usually run. But through the breathlessness and my long days, God keeps teaching me lessons. Some days it's perseverance; other days, it's letting go. On this particular run, God was talking to me about His strength and listening to Him. I complained I was tired.
He told me, "Keep going. I will give you strength."
"How much further?"
He said, "Keep going. I will give you strength."
"God, I'm tired."
"Keep going. I will give you strength."
"Can I just stop now?
"Stop. Rest in my strength. In your weakness, I am strong."
"I'm just going to walk now."
"See that up ahead? Run for it. I will give you strength."
Through that back and forth while I was just trying to keep moving forward, God kept reminding me of His strength.
I'm sorry to say, the running was the easier lesson God gave me in learning about His strength in the last week. Apparently more understanding of God's strength and ability is what I've needed to learn about in these last weeks.
My second lesson in God's strength came when I realized how much I've been trying to do on my own. From making sure I get enough hours at work in order to pay for School of Worship to thinking I'm good enough when I spend time with just me and Him, thinking I'm fine without community. Boy do I have it wrong. This past weekend was Easter. I haven't missed an Easter service in my entire life. But because I was trying to do things by my own strength, I was at work rather than at an Easter service or with my family. Because of making the choice when I got hired to not vocalize needing Sundays off for church, I'm having to pay for it now and it's frustrating.
Through the frustration with the mistakes I've made, He keeps reminding me he is higher. Through the "Why did I make that decision?" He holds the mistake. Through my thinking I can do everything on my own, God has constantly reminded me I need His help. I'm thankful He is a gentleman in His ways and lets me make decisions (although sometimes I wish I was kept from making mistakes in the first place). And through everything, He holds it all and His strength is what I need.
